Some things to know before you call me a home wrecker...

To all of the women being accused of being a "home wrecker" or being anything other than your wonderful self... this blog is for us. Let's empathize with each other and take a moment to love our life, ourselves, and most of all, our worth. 

We all know that in an intimate relationship, there is always going to be "a bump in the road"... or whatever it's called these days. These bumps can be caused by anything: money, sex, time spent or not enough time spent with your partner, etc. One of the biggest problems with some relationships, that I've experienced, are "external obstacles." In any relationship, there is always going to be a dog in the manger who is going to try and bring you and your partner down as a unit. It could be anyone. Your best friend, your ex girlfriend or boyfriend, your family...anyone. The question is, what do you do in those situations? How can you and your partner thrive when you have those external obstacles?

I am only shedding perspective on what my experience has been with my soon to be husband.

Six years ago, I met him for the first time. We went on one date, and it just wasn't the right time for justifiable reasons. We remained friends, but we never talked. If you've read my first blog, you would know that I was in an abusive relationship with someone for close to 3 years. My guy was also in a relationship with someone for a long time that ended up going south for reasons that I do not have the authority to tell. We got together fairly quickly after separating from our former relationships with said people. To some people, that looked bad. But we already knew deep down inside that this was the best decision ever made in the history of decisions. We quickly became thick as thieves. I will say that my guy knew I had a lot of healing to do from a lot of different things. We became vulnerable to each other and are mending each other's wounds by being amazing to each other. We ALL deserve to be with someone that is going to lift us up and help us be the best version of ourselves that we can be. 

With that being said, we have had some stuff come to our attention that has bummed us both out. This bump in the road has now turned into an off road adventure. Rest assured, we always come back home, but you have to wonder why people cast stones at you when they don't even know who you are?  In the finest words of my good friend and hairstylist, "they hate you if they ain't you. So, fuck the haters." I try and see the good in people, but sometimes, you just can't. 

I'm going to keep this really simple, and to be honest, the simplest solutions are usually always the answer: At the end of the day, no matter what anyone says about you and your partner and no matter what anyone thinks about you and your partner, they really don't know shit from Shinola.  You get to go to the breweries, the dinners, the weekend trips, ALL of that with your partner. I have full and resting faith that my guy would undoubtedly NEVER put me in a situation that I feel uncomfortable, and vise versa. Him and I are an incredibly strong and unbreakable unit. At the end of the day, it's me and him and these four wild and wonderful dogs. At the end of the day, you and your partner are undefeated. 

Here's to the women holding it down and keeping your relationships strong and healthy! Don't let anyone ever tell you anything differently! Don't ever let anyone try and destroy the life that you're trying to make for yourself and your partner! Don't let anyone ever try and take your power away from you!  Be bold. Be beautiful. Be yourself. Always. 

"When you talk about me, it says more about you."

-Joe Budden